Squirting, Gushing, Ejaculation!
Any man who wants to discover how to make a woman squirt needs to be tactful about how he approaches the subject. A good way to start is by asking her if she knows what female ejaculation is, and enquiring if she’s interested in trying it out….
The same tact is needed if you’re a woman who wants to try it, and you’d like your man to help you learn how to squirt. Maybe you could say something about how you’ve been reading about female ejaculation and now you want to try it.
How To Make It Happen
Keep in mind that although many men have probably seen female ejaculation on the Internet, very few will actually have tried it with a real-life partner.
Those lucky men who have discovered how to make a woman squirt, or witnessed a woman gushing at the moment of orgasm may feel privileged to introduce a woman to the skills and techniques of female ejaculation.
Those who haven’t will enjoy discovering about female ejaculation with their female partner.
In either case, most men will be avid fans of the idea of making their woman squirt.
G Spot Orgasm and Squirting
The first step is to find the places on a woman’s G spot which are most sensitive. These may not remain the same from one session of sex to the next, but you can always have fun finding them again!
The best way to do this is for the woman to tell her partner what feels good as he explores your vagina with a gentle finger – a finger that is smooth, without any hangnails, and very well lubed.
One of the problems here of course is that men may try to take charge of this process, which can be challenging for women who are not assertive in bed.
But bear in mind this is about female power, so it’s important the woman gives feedback to her partner on what she’s feeling; and especially on what feels good, what feels better, and what feels best as he moves his finger over her G spot.
And although this sounds like it’s the man’s job to make his woman ejaculate, the woman should be in control at all times.
She needs to give him the information he needs to stimulate her in the way that is most pleasurable.
If you can both make the exploration of the G spot playful and erotic, perhaps with a sense of discovery, you’ll be engaged and interested, and want to play more in the future.
There are detailed instructions on how to make a woman squirt as she comes and how to develop female ejaculation elsewhere on this website, but there are some interesting things to know first.
To start with, you’re going to find your ability to ejaculate depends more on your capacity to lose yourself in a state of sexual arousal than it does on sexual positions or technique.
In fact opening up to your feminine energy can be a very good metaphor for the process of opening up to the possibility of releasing Amrita, the sexual fluid that comes from the female prostate and is ejaculated at the moment of orgasm.
But nonetheless you might want to try some specific positions to make it easier to ejaculate – and one of the easiest is the missionary position, where the woman puts her legs up on her partner’s shoulders.
This will give him access to the opening of the vagina and the G spot with both finger and penis, and also gives you or him access to your clitoris to increase sexual arousal.
For both men and women:
Although the basis of female ejaculation – and indeed knowing how to make a woman come – is G spot stimulation, you can maintain the woman’s arousal and keep it building as you explore G spot stimulation with the man’s finger or erect penis by continually stimulating her clitoris.
(This might be possible during intercourse if the man has enough ejaculation control. But generally it’s more likely to be during finger play inside her, perhaps with simultaneous oral stimulation of the clitoris.)
One of things that’s really important in this process is to connect emotionally.
Eye gazing and intimate connection, and lots and lots of compassionate, connected and loving foreplay, can really help a woman open her heart and her body.
And it’s great to take things slowly.
Men, being very goal oriented, may want to rush ahead to the climax (i.e. making the woman squirt!) and finish things quickly as possible.
Again, this is where the woman needs to be assertive, to control what’s happening for a couple.
After all, by learning to squirt, she is discovering how to give her man even more sexual pleasure: a great gift for a woman to give to her man.
He can honor this gift by respecting her process, moving at her speed, and supporting her – rather than trying to direct the process as they learn how to make her squirt.
A great position for G spot stimulation is oral sex, where the man can stimulate a woman’s clitoris, urethral opening, and vulva with his tongue – and he may even find that his tongue can reach a woman’s G spot near the entrance to her vagina if it swells and drops down as she becomes more aroused.
But whatever he does, the slower he goes the better, and at the point where the woman wants him to insert a finger as a prelude to stimulating the G spot – and hopefully making her squirt – he can do that very slowly but firmly, starting perhaps with the classic “come-hither” motion with his finger which is seen in so many videos and recommended in so many books.
This is a great way of shifting your focus from clitoris to G spot.
Not all women want something in their vagina when they ejaculate, so if this is true for you then you need to find a sexual position in which the man can easily withdraw his fingers or penis when you’re about to ejaculate. (Standing up rear entry might fall into that category!)
The key to ejaculating easily and pleasurably is for the woman to have sufficient G spot arousal and stimulation before the man enters her vagina with penis or fingers.
She can tell him to move at whatever speed suits her best, depending on where she is on the way to ejaculation. It’s best done in a way that won’t make him feel he is being told what to do!
So, for example, keep it positive – don’t say “NO! Don’t do that” but do say things like “Oh, that’s so sensitive and so delicious!”
Bear in mind it’s going to take a few sessions before both of you fully understand nature of G spot stimulation and ejaculation, but there’s no pressure on either of you to succeed quickly (or indeed at all).
Take your time and enjoy the exploration of your body and your sexuality.
As Deborah Sundahl says in her book, Female Ejaculation and The G Spot, the focus on sex positions will drop away over time and be replaced by a sense of the focus on emotional connection – on losing yourself in physical pleasure and emotional connection with your partner.
And at that point, even the excitement of having a man who knows how to make a woman squirt may become secondary to the process of enjoying sex together!
Location of the female G Spot*
*”Female anatomy with g-spot-en” by Tsaitgaist – Own work. Licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0 via Wikimedia Commons – commons.wikimedia.org